This blog entryis for all those crazy dog-loving owners out there. I need help. My boyfriend, Patrick, thank God has returned safely back from spending the holidays in Ireland with his family. I was meanwhile dog sitting El-Fred AKA Fred-the-Love-Machine for 10 days. Now this is the not the first time my readers have heard me mention Fred. Fred is P's basset hound, you know: hush puppy? I gotta tell you: I love animals and I am good to them. And heaven knows, I am good to this hound. But he is so emotionally high-maintenance!First of all he is King of the Roost (or P's home) and MINE when he comes to visit. He plops himself anywhere he likes, whines this pitiful plea to jump on beds and spoon, (oh and he has 2 big, comfy doggy beds of his own!!). When I first met Patrick, Fred was fatter. I used to fondly refer to him as "Fat Fred". ha ha ha. I started taking him out on daily walks (something P shame shame was not doing!!) Fred has, indeed, lost weight. But the walks are painful! First of all he is a hound. That means he has tracking and sniffing in his blood. Also, those little short legs of his means his head is right there basically at ground level. So, our walks are basically him with his wet nose to the ground sniffing everything. I mean.....EVERYTHING!! And this dog may be small but he weighs in at a solid 75 pounds. And he is strong and stubborn on that leash. So if he catches a scent that he needs to check out: I can huff and puff and pull but he is so strong he pulls ME to where he wants to go.
He also has a tiny, oh, shall we say itty bitty problem of NOT being potty-trained completely yet!!! And he is 3 and a half! Ciara, Patrick's daughter, defends him saying he is just a puppy. HECK NO, HE AIN'T!! That dog failed obedience school and Patrick and Ciara spoiled him rotten with kisses and love when he was this puppy with big, long ears and dark droopy eyes. Well, now he is big, and goes to the bathroom leaving BIG messes inside the house at times (ruining P's gorgeous hardwood floor). Patrick admits that Fred only seems to do it when he is rebelling against something. Sometimes he won't do it for days...then BAM! A week of it straight! And there is no excuse - he has a doggy door.
Ah.. Fred. Fred is nicknamed 'Love Machine" because this breed is not that common around these parts and he gets so much attention out in public for his cuteness - which he KNOWS he possesses. (P undoubtedly back when he was single picked this breed for the utter CHICK MAGNET that he is!!) GEEZ!!! This dog especially LOVES women! He trots right up to any strange lady and rolls over for her to pet his stomach. I mean, he has no shame - it's almost embarrassing! I told Patrick and he agrees that, although happy, that dog would go off with the prettiest 20-40 year -old woman in a snap and not look back!
So let's see. He is a chick magnet but he is great with kids. He gets tired fast on those little legs but he can get fat quickly and bitches if he doesn't get his walks from me. He follows me all around my house or P's house. He loves and licks Jordy-the-cat all over but he isn't potty trained. He let's himself get molested by this big black poodle at the dog park and ignores Patrick completely until he is ready to go home. He is a very vocal dog - he "talks" to me and P all the time. And we can tell when he is disgruntled with us by how he semi-growls, yips and grunts. I mean, he definitely has some beef with us and wants to let us know. Walks are all about him, I am just along for the ride. And lastly: did I mention - he has a problem with rolling in other dog's crap??? If it's there, he goes in for a shoulder dive - I have learned to look out for his diving posture after having to bathe him a couple times.
And where is his real owner all this time? Shoot. Patrick has let me take control of that dog. Heck. He is SO fascinated by his hound that he overlooks all the insanity. Sometimes I see P sitting on the couch just staring at Fred's antics or bitching, happy as can be. He adores his "Little Man" so much that I have NO doubt that I'd be sent packing if I didn't like Fred as much as I do or if Fred didn't accept me.
Shoot - give me my easy cat any day. Cats are independent. And small. And not loud. Or stinky. (sigh) :)
Does anyone else out there have a basset hound or other dog so crazy?? (Di - I know you got a 'horse', er Rottweiler you keep inside your house). I'd appreciate any suggestions or advice. Leave a comment so I don't feel all alone in the insanity that which is Fred.
click on Fred's slideshow!
7 comments:
That's a very handsome dog.
Very cute dog and you know I love Kilo just as much as P obviously adores his pooch.
Cesar Milan (The Dog Whisperer), would probably say this dog is Alpha. I would highly recommend DVRing this program on Mon. nights on the Nat'l Geographic channel. Older shows are on Fri. nights. He is awesome. His philosphy is exercise, discipline and affection in that order. Granted, John and I put affection first, but it's working.
As for the mishaps, that's going to need vigilance and correction. The minute you notice him roving for a place (I don't know if Fred has a sign he is getting ready), I would reprimand him w/ a quick no and take him outside to do his business. This will probably take many tries, but he needs to know it is not right.
Kilo is afraid of fireworks and will howel and bark. Well, I used to tell him it's ok, shhh, but he'd keep going. After watching Cesar (he states do not give affection when they are under stress or displaying poor behavior) I thought ohh, I'll try "No." It worked! Kilo stopped and looked perplexed when I told him, "No."
Cesar's motto: calm, assertive energy, AND, it's not the dog, it's the human that needs training.
Can you tell I love the guy. Kilo came in first place in dog obedience class. We have gotten very lazy though in recent years correcting him.
But El Fred never does his business when I am awake or around. Always when asleep or gone. I think it is a protest because he did not do it for almost a year and now its every now and then.
ha ha Patrick - did u leave that 1rst anonymous comment???
El Fred :) knows whom he can take advantage of then. E? - Diana
Could be a protest b/c when my friend's dog got pissed, she would go after his paintball masks! - D
Yes D over indulgence can make a brat in dogs and kids ;) But I need to get a bigger yard for him. Thanks for all the advice.
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