Learning Spanish

My full name is very hispanic. But I am of a growing hispanic minority born in the USA that didn't grow up speaking Spanish. My bilingual parents spoke it a little between themselves. And my mother did try to teach us a little bit. But, let's face it - they should have spoken it all the time to us at home because all of us kids greatly suffered in our personal and professional lives' at our not being bilingual. And, as children, it's the easiest way to learn languages - for you soak it up like a sponge. As an adult, one becomes self-concsious at making mistakes or having a bad accent. Point blank - I have suffered learning this language but have a lot of pride that I did so on my own. People just assume all latinos speak spanish. I am 3rd generation born American - I can assure not all of us are bilingual.

Here's a little walk down Memory Lane:

It was my first year of college, at the age of 18, that I really started yearning to learn more about my Mexican heritage and its romantic language. I became involved in the hispanic student organization MECHA to meet the few latinos who attended UC Irvine in the early 90s and sometimes wrote articles for La Voz Mestiza - the hispanic student school paper. But, mostly, I made a herculean effort to learn Spanish on my own. Interestingly, I mostly learned it through my huge love: Music.

I started listening to spanish radio all the time. I bought spanish-music tape cassettes (this is pre cds and mp3s). I would listen for hours to music and try to write down the lyrics in a notebook that I still have at my parents' home. I became a huge, screaming fan of handsome crooner Luis Miguel who was my age and a HUGE singing star. He was my favorite. I also started watching telenovelas (soap operas) during my vacations back at home in San Diego. The first one I watched was called, "La Picara Sonadora" - I even got my sister and mom to watch it with me. When I say it was the 'first one' I watched I refer to the fact that spanish-language soaps actually end after a few months. And they almost always end with a happy ending of the poor girl getting her prince *I mean rich, handsome man.

You can imagine, thus, that my spanish, from listening to music and watching over-dramatic novelas - was full of vocabulary about love, nature, revenge, romance and pain. HAHAHAH. Very dramatic. But not very useful, every-day language, one can say.

I needed to do more, then. So I decided that I could only have crushes on Latino boys. That way I could practice my spanish. Now, I was the biggest virgin in high school and college - and PROUD of it. But I had crushes, sure! And Latin men are muy romantico..... Spring Break of my freshman year - I was en route to having my first heart ache by a Latin man. I went with Diana, my roommate in college (and mentioned in the blog a few times) to Tijuana, Mexico for the first time to go dancing. We went with my younger cousin, Maddy, who was already highly-seasoned at going even though she was only in high school. She was also in a latin identity faze as well. She took us to where the real Mexicans were - not the bars full of drunk underage American kids and sailors. She took us to the OTHER end of Calle Revolucion ("Revolution Street") the main drag of bars and discos in TJ where there was a huge club called, "Las Pulgas" - The Fleas. I was in heaven with the spanish pop and roc-en-espanol on 1 floor and more traditional mexican music and dance on another.

I still remember it like it was yesterday. I set my eyes on a tall, Mexican boy across the room - I was a virgin, but I knew how to flirt! The girls nodded in approval. He was wearing jeans, boots, a shiny belt buckle, and a button down shirt and drinking a beer. His hair was straight, thick and longer on top - pushed back with a little gel.

I said to the girls we needed to walk past him and his boys so I could make eye contact (who knew this goody-goody was such a natural??!!) Well, we paraded past them and when I walked past, I gave him a sideways look and smile over my shoulder and he literally ran after me to catch up with me.I always thought he looked a bit like a Mexican Elvis. For he had full-lips and a handsome but baby-face that Elvis had. Even the hair reminded me of his circa 50s' look.

He asked me in spanish, "Como te llamas?" What is your name? And little did I know my life was to change forever. He was my first latin man. And my first heart break. Efren would figure in my life for the next several years - setting my even-nowadays standard of really trying with someone until they have absolutely killed me and there is truly nothing left of Elsa to give and cling onto.

By now, Diana is rolling her eyes and fanning herself over the memories and nightmare that would be my knowing him those many years. God bless her - she accompanied me many a night to TJ to meet him down there or to go to his baseball games.
And she stood by my side through the pain as well.

Was I in love with him? No. I knew we were young and inexperienced (he was my age). But I wanted to eventually be in love with him. I was crazy about him. He sang and danced mexican rancheros with me, literally sweeping me off my feet. "Six foot two, and all for you," he used to say, grinning that boyish grin of his. We met at 18 and he left my life at 28. We will eternally be remembered as young and stupid.

Too bad, with him, I set the precedent at being involved with men who can't commit and take but don't give much back. It's amazing when I look back now at 35 that I have always given much more in my relationships and continue to still do it. I know it's a latin trait in women - we are extremely giving. But, I've gone to hell paying for it and continue to suffer even now for possessing that character. A character that is so generous it is actually a negative fault when it comes to me and men.

I will say one thing though. Dating someone who speaks spanish was a great way to really accelerate my learning! Do you like elsamart's novela? Stay tuned for more. I figure something has to come out of all the memories in my head...

Cousins Jacob & Rosa Wedding!!

If you know me at all (or read past blogs) you are tuned into the fact that mine is a huge family. My mother is the oldest of 8 children so you can imagine how many aunts, uncles and cousins I have just from her side of the family!! :)


True to our Mexican roots - we have many get-togethers, eat a lot, are loud, gregarious and fun to be around. And when something extra special comes up - engagements, births, graduations - the Araizas (my mom's maiden name) sure know how to throw a great shindig!

In this case, one of my 19 Araiza first-cousins: Jacob got married last weekend to his long-time novia: Rosa. A wedding is always a blessed and huge celebration with much happiness - and this was no exception. Oddly enough, for a hispanic family, with major role models of the love and importance of 'familia' and having children - 11 of us (me included) have not yet taken the plunge to get hitched. Therefore, the 8 weddings we have had the last 2 decades (starting with my oldest sister Cecilia) have been far between.

Thus, one can imagine that when we do have one - it's hailed as the 'Wedding of the Year'! It feels like we've all been waiting and emailing and making travel plans for ages! Being Northern California residents for some years now, the couple decided to have the wedding take place in San Francisco. Most of the 150 guests were either our southern Cal family or Rosa's also large family. Thus everyone essentially made a vacation trip out of it.

No complaints there - who doesn't want to go to San Fran in the summertime??! It was a real blast with a lot of the family staying at the same hotel in Union Square - thus starting the celebration days early by dining together and hitting the hip hotel bar's Happy Hour.
As for the wedding, itself - we all know Jake enough to know that his Cal Berkeley education and liberal upbringing would call for a somewhat, ahem, unconventional ceremony. I loved it! Taking place amongst the tall redwood trees of Stern Grove near Golden Gate Park, the ceremony was full of nature, spirituality, and ethnic origins as the bilingual and uber-cool officiant dressed in white linen traditional ethnic dress first greeted all the guests asking us all to take a bead and hold it in our left hand for good blessings and love throughout the ceremony, until the end when we placed them all back in front in a basket for the newlyweds. With Jake being a superb music-lover, collector and DJ, I knew music would be a treat at this wedding - and thus I greatly enjoyed the conjunto trio softly playing their latin rhythms and percussion throughout the ceremony off to the side. In the smoke of burning sage as incense, a bird's feather was waved from head-to-foot over the couple in a traditional Apache gesture, as well we acknowledged the different signs and directions of the earth (north, south, east and west) and their representations - - it was all very cool!!

Of course, being San Fran and in the midst of the very tall trees blocking out the little sun there was, it was quite chilly, thus as soon as the ceremony ended - we all (very uncharacteristically for such a Catholic family, might I add? hahahah) rushed the open bar and started sipping on wonderful rum, wine and sangria to take the edge off. Pictures followed - Patrick took some of the Aunts and Uncles and then of us cousins - everyone was in ridiculously great spirits and by the time the heat lamps were turned on and the yummy latin food was laid out - the noise level was as high as the alcohol buzz most of us were feeling!
There is so much I can write about. I shall try to sum up the highlights: great dancing music provided by DJ David (my cousin Maddy's husband); the 'loteria' table cards that told us where we were sitting were amazingly hand-drawn by Rosa's sister; the gorgeous, multi-colored and multi-textured flowers were painstakingly and generously done by cousin Maddi (employing her old job's skills); great speeches were toasted to; Cousin Paul (freshly returned from his 2-month sojourn to Europe) was actually able to pull off wearing blindingly-white dress shoes; Rosa's tiny 94 year-old grandmother was drinking wine both at the wedding and the previous evening at 11pm in the hotel bar with everyone!!

It was such a great time - and one last word - as I informed Patrick, "All celebrations in our family are such blessings, but especially my cousins that were close to me in age (Jacob, Maddi, Noey, me, sister Sara and Jude) because they we were not only close in age, but also some of our best friends growing up: attending camp and the beach together, play time at each other's houses, going to TJ when we got older - shoot: my cousins were the only ones my mom let us spend the night at!"

Therefore, an extra special abrazo of happiness to my younger cousin Jacob - who, being the youngest of our troop, was forced to eat dirt, dress up as a girl, follow Maddy around on all fours as her dog, make lemonade stands with us, play church with us (we'd put uncooked popcorn kernals in his squished-up wonderbread and make him eat it for 'communion') and seeing him always play with his dinosaurs and Transformers - I am mighty proud of the tall, handsome, gentle, and socially-aware young man he has grown into. I am so happy for him and Rosa - Que Dios los Bendiga!!!

Click below and watch the slideshow!!

Jakewedding

Soy "Lunatica" for Gotan Project

I wanted to write about this group, Gotan Project for quite some time. I say this because they are AMAZING and I think some of my readers might enjoy them. They are truly one of my favorite groups in the world - and I have a pretty diverse musical taste. That said, meet Gotan Project - made up of 1 Swiss, 1 Argentine, and 1 Parisian (sometimes joined by a Spanish female vocalist). Their music is part chill, ambient, electronica - all infused with original, basic tango influence. Sometimes political, and always pure art and sexy - they are truly one-of-a-kind. No worries about the language barrier - a lot of it is instrumental and besides, the music itself will make you feel so sensual - even if you are NOT a spicey latina like me! I came upon them about 5 years or so ago, on the Los Angeles NPR station: KCRW. Regular pop American stations will not play this kind of music, you see - even if they are famous from Tokyo to Mexico to Australia. I imagine, in North America, they are at their least popular or known. *Well, someone DID have the foresight to include them in the Jennifer Lopez remake of the Japanese movie, "Shall we Dance?". Their song plays when she seductively teaches Richard Gere how to REALLY tango and feel the music and passion. Holy hot tamales! If you've seen the movie, you KNOW the scene I am referring to.

A couple years back in Italy, I had the good fortune to see them live in concert - without the thrills of being young and gorgeous, with choregraphed dancing - they were just real, talented, unique musicians hard at work and doing what they do best - bringing the native sounds of Argentina music mixed with modern ambient electronica to an international fan base of all ages.

As for the above video, "Diferente" from their sophomore album, "Lunatico" - I not only LOVE the song and love both the beautiful Argentine young woman AND handsome young man featured in it - but it's a brilliant show of unique video-making. Note the use of the mirror doubling-effect and the very interesting surprise at the end of the video! Bonus points goes to who comments first on what "Gotan" means... :)