A Child of God

 

My blessed Aunt Gini sent me this recently. An excerpt from Nelson Mandela's inauguration speech - it really struck a chord with me. I am not a brave person, yet I know I am Strong. It is due to my Faith. But as strong as I am, I have at times suffered from a debilitating fear of inadequacy and not being as outstanding as I was raised to be... One thing I know, though... I am a Child of God. And I must always give thanks and be aware of my Faith, for I know it will help me confront all my fears.


OUR DEEPEST FEAR IS NOT THAT WE ARE INADEQUATE.
OUR DEEPEST FEAR IS THAT WE ARE POWERFUL BEYOND MEASURE.
IT IS OUR LIGHT, NOT OUR DARKNESS THAT MOST FRIGHTENS US.

WE ASK OURSELVES, "WHO AM I TO BE
BRILLIANT, GORGEOUS, TALENTED AND FABULOUS?"
ACTUALLY, WHO ARE YOU NOT TO BE?

YOU ARE A CHILD OF GOD.
YOUR PLAYING SMALL DOES NOT SERVE THE WORLD.
THERE IS NOTHING ENLIGHTENED ABOUT SHRIVELING
SO THAT OTHER PEOPLE WONT FEEL INSECURE AROUND YOU.

WE WERE BORN TO MAKE MANIFEST
THE GLORY OF GOD WITHIN US.
IT IS NOT JUST IN SOME OF US. IT IS IN EVERYONE.

AS WE LET OUR OWN LIGHT SHINE,
WE UNCONSCIOUSLY GIVE OTHER PEOPLE
PERMISSION TO DO THE SAME.
AS WE ARE LIBERATED FROM OUR OWN FEAR,
OUR PRESENCE AUTOMATICALLY LIBERATES OTHERS.

-NELSON MANDELA

Fun in the Snow 2010

more videos of the Martinez Big Bear family vacation - -

The Snowlodge House

Here are 2 videos of me walking through the house on our last morning - - I realized afterwards that I didn't even film the east wing of the house - - where the 2 master bedrooms where (my siblings were generous and aside from my parents having one, they allowed us newlyweds in the other). I also missed the upstairs loft where the the girl cousins crashed together...ah,well - - at least this helps a bit so the family remembers what it looks like :)

Martinez Snow Trip 2010

Earlier this month the Martinez clan made the journey to Big Bear Lake, California for our 3rd family snow trip together. This is always a feat in itself - there are 8 in my family and now with spouses and grandkids we number 22 (!) hahah that is a lot of mouths to feed..

The house we rented was huge - tons of bedrooms, 3 living rooms, a pool hall and even an indoor jacuzzi -ahhh. We have a blast playing games, sledding, the kids take ski lessons and all the adults (sans accident-prone Elsa) ski and snowboard.

This year was extra-special having my own family with me. Ciara got to miss 2 days of school to snowboard with her dad and play night and day with her 8 cousins - - not too shabby for originally an only child. We are loud and laugh a lot - - she was so tired she actually went to bed early every night - I have never seen this!

I am so proud of the kids - for some of them it was their first time skiing. Others have barely done it - and they are all so good and fearless - - but nothing comes close to seeing my sweet autistic nephew Ryan go down the mountain with his special ed (bravo) ski instructor and his mamma - - he was so relaxed and my heart just swells thinking of it!

Wonderful times, we are so blessed to have these times together -- God is great!

Click on slideshow below for more!

Snowtrip 2010

Opera en el Mercado - Espana

My aunt Nora sent this to me and it was so enchanting to me that I cried through it. In Valencia, Spain, in some random market, strains of the music began and real Opera singers disguised as regular people emerged to sing Verdi's La Traviata to the astonished shoppers.

Europe has infinitely been the forefather of opera composers, performers and patrons - - this type of artistic impromptu performance could therefore of course take place in a lovely city like Valencia.

Bravi, bravi!! Saludos y abrazos de parte de esta cantante y estudiante de la musica classical...

My Green Wedding Dress

 Although I have modeled for many, many bridal shows the last few years, I have never been a fan of the white princess wedding ballgown - - no offense to any out there - - if you can't tell by now I am a little unconventional about the whole wedding thing - hehehe.

I saw this Max Azria dress years ago and knew then and there I wanted to get married in it. When a photographer peer asked about shooting together again I excitedly told him I had a fabulous Latina-green (hey! the same green as this blog heheh) dress that I wanted to shoot in. So I threw on some makeup and we did an impromptu photoshoot with natural lighting. I had a blast playing with the layers of it - - the dress is made for movement and, therefore, good for modeling. Thank you, Jeremy of JDelizo Photography. The photos were fun..

These are my favorite unworked photos - only the color and cropping tweaked by me slightly on Picassa - -

Click on slideshow below for more!

My Wedding Dress photoshoot

San Diego Custom Car Show

I am not into cars at all, but last November P's ex-wife (who, with her husband produces it) gave us tickets to go to the San Diego Custom Car and lowrider show at the Convention Center.

We were there all of a half hour and took some shots of the interesting cars. True to myself, I will admit I was more interested in people-watching than the cars. Mostly ghetto, cholo, and oldschool Chicano - - like many of my students who I see often-enough hehehe - they wandered around talking the talk and walking the walk. The real thing. Patrick and I were the whitest people there - hehehhe

Click on slideshow below, if it so interests you - :)

San Diego Custom Car and Lowrider Show

MakeAWish

A few weeks ago Patrick and I were asked to volunteer our services as photographers for the recipient of the San Diego chapter of the MakeAWish foundation - Erik Rodriguez.

Of course we were pleased to help out in any way, but we were both so touched that I really would like to remember the event by posting it on here.

 

Eric is a 17-year-old young man from El Centro, California. He was in a bad car accident as a child that left him a paraplegic. As if that were not challenging-enough - he has never known his father and his mother is a drug-addict so he has bounced back and forth between foster parents for years. One only had to look at this boy's face and eyes to see the weight of the world within.

Upon learning he won the chance to have a wish granted - this extraordinary young man looked at the TV, saw and ad for children in need in Africa and uttered in his quiet way, "Well, can I help them?" He could have met the President or a celebrity or had a walk on role in a film with Angelina Jolie - - even possibly having something done in his own poor community in El Centro -- but this humble, special boy essentially opted to GIVE his wish away.

So with the money that would have been used for his wish, he donated it to 5 villages in Africa where they erected wells and running water and gardens among other life-changing incidentals.

Obviously the Foundation wanted him to receive some accolades for his unselfish wish. So they brought him, his foster parents and his best friend from high school to San Diego. Put up in a decorated room just for him (with Twilight stuff, balloons, his favorite chips - Doritos)at the Hyatt in La Jolla - he was fussed over by a stylist and hairstylist who bought him 2 outfits and got him ready for his big night - the MakeAWish press party at the Del Mar Fairgrounds where they would present him with the check that he would then present to the representatives for the African foundation set up in his name.

 

We took along our daughter, Ciara, so she could see, firsthand, the bravery and generosity of this fellow hispanic youth. Upon arriving we found Erik to be so shy and his foster parents didn't even speak English. I chimed in in Spanish telling him my parents grew up in Mexicali and Calexico. He noticeably brightened when I spoke Spanish and told him I had had family from those parts. (They should have had a bilingual rep the whole time there for him and especially for the foster parents). He also told me how he felt overwhelmed by the attention and fuss - - but I told him to understand they wanted to do something for him since he was already giving up his wish.

It was truly a memorable evening - both Patrick and I were very proud to be a part of it in our small way. May God Bless this extraordinary young man....

The "Golden Hour" - La Jolla

My photographer husband has much to teach me about photography if he wants me to understand all the jargon and technical lingo he uses - - hheheh

But it is a blessing that we both share an appreciation and eye for photography - - even if he is eons ahead of me in education and skill.

These photos were shot at the "Golden Hour" and sunset in La Jolla off the Wind and Sea neighborhood. It was a warm, wonderful and romantic afternoon with my husband - - outside of us almost getting stuck out at sea on a big bird rock when the tide came in - - followed by thin, Italian pizza at the old haunt "Marinos" in Pacific Beach. Simple pleasures... :)

La Jolla, California

Disneyland

Remember this blog here where we were taking my stepdaughter Ciara to Disneyland for her 11th bday? Well, I am barely getting up some pics and the video of the Fantasia lightshow - really cool - I was telling P that my mom used to not let us as kids or my nieces and nephews watch the beginning part with the devil - too scary. And it WAS - - I thought part of this show was scary, too, for little kids.

Speaking of scary - - check out Ciara's face here as she sits miserable (although she won't admit it) through Space Mountain. Ciara inherited from her Pop a fear of roller coasters - although she was trying hard not to admit it. I think her dad was pretty scared, too. hehehhe. I sat alone, in the very front with my arms up in the air hooping and hollering the whole while - - did I really marry into this family??? I guess no family trips to the much more scarier, taller and faster rides of Magic Mountain will be in order...

How Paddy spent His Holiday...

When I first started dating P almost 4 years ago, I was impressed with the handiwork and upgrades he had done himself on his condo. I do not speak only of his careful painting job - as I was well-versed. myself, in painting several times my previous apartments in Mission Hills back in the day. That said, P had upgraded his bathroom - ripping out the old dated mirrors, sink, etc and buying a cherry redwood matching sink and mirror, painting the whole thing and tiling the shower.

But right now I speak of the kitchen upgrade.

Oh, yes. The kitchen. I remember entering his condo the first time where he humbly pointed out his kitchen - - where half of it gleamed in urban, concrete perfection in an ash-gray color. Note that I said, 'half'..

Well, it is back-breaking work to do on your own. One can opt to have a contractor do it like my best friend Diana did. Patrick saved at least 2 grand doing it himself and having the pride to see his work everyday. But he didn't raise a finger to finish the other half of the kitchen for the ENTIRE - yes, ENTIRE, time I have known him - GOOD LORD.

Those who know me know I grew up in a house for 20 years that was in a state of constant repair, upgrading, addition, etc - - so I am ahem, a little, um, OCD about having my living space in order, clean and comfortable. Now I realize that not everyone cares to live one way or the other. But this gal does. And I have always taken a certain amount of proud even with my little apartments back in the day - - one can only imagine now with a larger living space that we actually own, I want it to be finished, clean and (snap!) snazzy.

So, P on his week-long holiday was put to work. The kitchen concrete and the whole mess that went with it was stared down and conquered. I am so proud of him. What a deplorable mess it made. Threw the whole feng shui off for the animals, plus the noise and dirt - don't get me started - - plus we had to eat out for 2 days straight when things had to be moved and turned off. I hate eating out that often - !

Believe me, I am thrilled it is done. And I even can see (just a teeny eeny point) in P's having put it off for almost 4 years - -he he he...

Now if only we were finished with all the painting and reworking the wooden floors.....sigh

 

Day 1 - mixing the 4 bags of 50 pounds of concrete - - back-breaking and incredibly dirty work. Poor P was pretty sore doing this. He advises anyone else to rent a concrete mixer and don't be crazy like him.

 

Later on Day 1 - spreading and handling the smut - -

 

Smoothing out the dirty work....

 

Late afternoon, Day 2 - - more or less the finished product - just some drying, and some waxing and sealing to go!

A North Park New Year!

 

Patrick and I have been working on our condo all week while he is on vacation and didn't go to Ireland for the holidays - per the norm.

Although invited to a few outings and house parties for the New Year - we both lagged on making a decision, preferring to finish as much work as possible while we had the time and were motivated.

 

Let me put it this way - - by 9:30pm we were covered in paint and concrete dust, and don't even get me started on the heavy doses of Ibuprofen we were both taking as we were both in a lot of pain from all the work. We figured time was running short so we better clean up so we could mosy down the street and see what we can find without investing too much effort or money so last-minute.



One of the things I love about our location in North Park is that we are a quick and easy walk to the bars and restaurants that have sprung up the past few years. We found ourselves turning our noses up at some of our regular hangouts with huge cover charges and pretentious crowds and opted for the free -- oh yes -- -F R E E - party at the gay dive bar (yes, you read it correctly although it sounds wrong) REDWING on 30th Street.

I have to give it to the folks there. We were easily able to join in on the fun at 11pm - - not a cent was paid in cover, we were given tickets to win door prizes as our IDs were checked -- there were noise-makers, hats and tiaras for everyone - - not to mention karaoke (George Michael and Beyonce songs were the favorite of the evening)... this also included free champagne toast at midnight for all and STRONG, cheap drinks. (Take THAT, foofy West Coast bar - - who were charging $50 at the door, the drinks aren't strong, only party masks for the first 50 through the door, and no champagne toast).

The evening was perfect, I got my gay man quota for the week - - everyone was in a super mood and neighborly with each other, the drag queens looked magnificent -- we even were able to find a place at the bar to crowd watch and for me to sing along with the karaoke 80s songs.

Happy NEW YEAR to all my loved ones!

Click on Slideshow below!

New Years Eve 2009