September 30, 2008

 
'Having Faith' is believing in Something you cannot see.

I've had Faith my whole Life...

Puede ser? Could it be?

 



It is. Small, but bright. A glimmer and reflection of that which I carry inside me.

A Light at the end of the Tunnel..

Someone get that girl a Hankey!!

If you read my blog last week stating that I somewhat successfully was able to transfer some video from my parents' video camera to my computer - after I thought I had lost it all - you will understand that I will be (except for any technical difficulties) posting some videos onto Youtube and here.

They are mostly of family, and I certainly wouldn't expect any one of you readers to spare a couple minutes watching them. That said, this blog serves, more than anything- as a journal of my life - which includes family, travel, my cat, friends, deep thoughts, poetry and YES: Patrick.

Call me a martyr but I am posting the video of last Easter which was when we announced our engagement to some of my family -only about half were there. I admit, that I cried upon viewing it the first time but they were mostly tears of happiness at seeing such a joyous occasion.

Too bad, for whatever reason, uploading it onto youtube lost the good quality the original has. This video is much more grainy but that might be just as well since you can't really see the tears streaming down my face the entire time on the video he he he :P

Of course, my huge family has a great sense of humour so I want to point out things I thought were noteworthy to watch out for.

Firstly, my oldest brother Gabriel is filming - he didn't know what was going on - so you hear him first asking out loud, "What? What is going on?" as we await my father's announcement. Another thing that I love is seeing my autistic nephew, Ryan, jumping around and pounding on the piano excitedly when he hears the family cheer for us. He most likely was unable to wrap his head around why we were cheering - but the fact that he was happy and cheering along with all the rest makes me think that deep down inside that beautiful boy knows exactly what is going on - he just doesn't vocalize it like we do... :)

Next you see Gabe congratulate Patrick and welcome him into the family with a hearty handshake and even heartier, "I wish you, 'good luck', Patrick...goooood LUCK" - gotta see it to hear the emphasized comic timing.

Then you see my oldest sister, Cecilia and Gabe looking at my Irish Claddah ring that Patrick brought me from Ireland and you hear Ceci comment to me and then pan to the camera, "It doesn't look 'masculine' one bit.." - hilarious!!

But the best part was hearing my dear mamma ask for everyone to pray for us (deaammn, ya'll didn't pray hard enough - shoot!!) and 'how she wished that Ciara - their new granddaughter-to-be was there with us all that day'. My family knows that it takes a lot to be involved with a someone who has a child from a previous relationship. Especially if you have a heart and concern similar to mine in regards to children. I remain utterly grateful for my family and extended family's ease in acceptance and love for Ciara and Patrick right from the beginning. I know we are loud, gregarious and very spiritual and that sometimes overwhelmed my shy, quiet Irishman - but he was extremely blessed to be in our family and I suspect he knows knows it quite well.

And of course, it wouldn't be a Latino family without right after the short, but important announcement and cheering, the host and other sister, Sylvia, jumps up and commands, "Okay, now we can eat!" as if to say, "Okay, let's get to the REAL announcement that: dinner is served!!"

As I mentioned in the blog written about it at the time (click here), there are sometimes downsides to being the youngest - mine was just another engagement announcement in a huge family - which probably was just as well as you can see how self-conscious Patrick was during the whole thing - he doesn't like being the center of attention - sigh :)

Linked in at the Linkery

Call it nostalgia, call it insane - but I worked a ton this summer and still have many little blogs and pictures to post from the past. Even though I am literally fighting back the tears looking at my companion in most of the subject matter - I can only say that no matter how much he continues to hurt me daily by his actions and decisions, I cannot, unlike him, deny our so very recent history together and thus get the strength to publish these anyway. Actually my strength comes from my Love for him that cannot be, doesn't want to be, nor should be expected to be gone in only 3 weeks. Nor do I believe for one moment that deep down he isn't hurting as much as I am. Well, almost as much as I am... sigh

 

This was taken at this summer at the Linkery in Northpark. A memorable night out with Richele, P, and Dave - a former coworker of Patricks.

 

Between the great sausages (big weenies, really) at the Linkery, dancing dizzily to the very loud band with Richele at the Pink Elephant Bar, to Fred-the-Basset bursting to get to Richele's lap, and Dave's mega interest in Fred, the Spanish waitress and then Richele (all in that order) - - all made for good times.

 

Click below on slideshow!

Linkery Night

Casa de Carlos

 

Here is an extremely sexy photo of Heidi and Carlos from House of Blues on Friday night. After a very engaging discussion between her, Carlos, me and Pedro about foreign films - we had left that evening saying we would all get together and see one. I am the type who means it when I say, "we should keep in touch" and love people who follow through with their promises - and sure enough last night I found myself happily sitting with Heidi, her new friend Joel from Puebla, Mexico and Carlos - who hosted an amazing movie night complete with a meal he prepared that Heidi and I were in awe with.

"Your momma taught you right!" I exclaimed at first bite. Amazingly good. After some great conversation and yummy sangria that somehow I managed - light weight that I am - to drink 3 wine glasses of we started Carlos' foreign film choice - the Spanish remake of "Carmen" - think the French opera by Bizet.

Between being in awe of the period piece's costumes of the ridiculously gorgeous and voluptuous Spanish women's bosoms spilling out of open, peasant blouses and poking fun at Carlos who sat in awe of actress, Paz Vega, who was essentially undressed the whole film - it made for a a very entertaining evening. It could only have been made better by Alana (who was feeling poorly) and Pedro who were unable to attend.

I just want to point this out - I met Heidi scarcely 8 days ago, have seen her 3 times already. We both met Carlos on Friday night and within 3 days have seen him twice. Then she met Joel in her triathlon group only 3 days ago, brought him and now we met him and have plans on all getting together again - - this is exactly the kind of openness, friendliness and spontaneity that I pride myself on having and to be with like-minded people at this moment in my life- when I really need to grow and be strong - is something I am so thankful for. I am just tickled pink :)

Un abrazo a todos mis amigos nuevos!

"Lights" Really Turn it ON!

 

YYYYEEEAAAAHHHHHHH! Friday night was a KICK at House of Blues where I gathered a few 80s fans made up of both new and very old friends to join me in supporting and singing along with an old schoolmate/actor friend of mine, Juan Del Castillo, as he fronts the very worthy tribute band to Journey, called "Lights Band".

Firstly, I must preface this by saying with my sometime ridiculous work ethic of never saying 'no' to work offered me, I was always working the past 3 times that the "Lights Band" has made it to San Diego. Well, I knew I would make this concert this time even if I had to go alone -something that wouldn't have bothered me in the least since I am very outgoing and a people-person. Let's just say it this way - it wouldn't have been the first concert I would have gone to alone - and I am actually quite proud to admit to that :) he he he

That said, my week was improving when I got my 80s-dancing partner in crime, Richele, to come with me. I then thought to invite my 80s and Journey-loving ex boyfriend from highschool, Joey and my even longer known neighbor and his best friend, Eric, to join us. I was very excited and then thought, 'why the heck not invite my new gal buddies I met under such extraordinary circumstances less than a week ago at Ray At Night?" If you read the blog I called them, H and A - Heidi and Alana. As Heidi commented to me, "I shall finally get my '15 minutes'!"

 

Ah yes, the night had FUN, good people and GREAT music written all over it. Let's get to the band - - AWESOME!!!! I have performed professionally with Juan before, and know the boy can really blow (slang for really belt it out in a passionate way). I remember when he was signed onto a record label for a while and even had a hit song in Spanish on the radio - I am so proud of him. :) Knowing his high tenor voice and forward-placed quality of singing (singers might know what I am talking about here) I knew his voice would be perfect for Steve Perry and Journey repertoire.. and he didn't disappoint.

 

Joey brought from work, Puerto Rican marine and UBER-Journey fan, Pedro - who ended up being such great company. I think Pedro even had a better time than I did (como es posible?!!!!) as he knew all the words even to the older songs from the late 70s and pre-Steve Perry. Shucks - we were all impressed by him and got even happier by seeing how into it he was. As Eric joked, "By the 3rd song Pedro was ready to go home with Juan" - - HA HA the boy is straight, ya'll!!

Eric, Joey and I are all professional singers and musicians to varying degrees - and were all pretty darn impressed and not let down by the band and Juan's singing. Hot dog - just awesome - top notch! Plus my dear Joey was such a good sport because he knows he can sing Journey pretty well himself but even he admitted to Juan that he (Juan) has got about 1.5 notes higher range than Joey - Ha HA - we are such dorks - love it!

The crowd was mostly 40s with everyone having a great time and even though we were all standing pretty close - about 3 rows back in the throng - sometimes I just had to get right up there to the stage (even once seriously ticking off 2 older blond women who did NOT like my pushing past them to stretch my hand out to Juan for him to hold)...

Well, gosh darn it - when the 80s music gets a hold of E - I just have to 'work it out!'

The great concert was ended even better by Juan spending time with us at our table for a bit, in his sincere down-to-earth way (I love down-to-earth people). You could just tell he was so appreciative of us all coming and he enjoyed talking with and meeting everyone.

And to go with my week long theme of meeting fabulous new friends under out-of-the-norm circumstances - the girls and I zoomed in on and started talking to an accented man who went ALONE - that is exactly what I mean about just having to get out and do - even if it's by yourself - the things you like). Being the colorful people we are we immediately hit if off with him and invited him to join the rest of the eve with us upstairs. Por favor, meet Carlos-the-Spaniard - who hellooo, if you know me, read my blog, or even look at my headline at the top of the page you should know that elsamart is a huge Europhile. Huge. Massive. Let me put it this way, if I hear an accent: I am white on rice, baby. White on Rice.

So there was E, pleased as punch, having gotten to sing and dance to her beloved 80s music with 2 old friends that are wonderful musicians themselves who have known me most of my life; my fabulous, 80s-loving Richele, my pretty new gal friends Heidi and Alana, passionate and full of life Pedro who made a great impression on all us girls and then our new friend from Madrid via Colorado: Carlos.

Great times filled with foreign language, music, talking with Heidi and new friends Pedro and Carlos about our love for travel, all things foreign and foreign films that we all need to see, etc etc... all I can say is that E was in her element... great people, great music, foreign languages = a superb evening :) Can't wait for the next one.

Click on and check out the slide show below of Lights Band and friends - Pictures generously used by permission from Miss Heidi, thank you very much... and see you all the next time the band comes to town :P

Lights Band

'Journey' into the 'Lights'

I am so excited and proud of my fellow chicano, highschool friend, Music Machine showchoir alumni and professional actor (we did my first Old Globe theater show together about 15 years ago) - Juan Castillo - who has been traveling while fronting 'Lights', a professional tribute band to the awesome rock/pop group of my beloved 80s era - JOURNEY.

As you see, they are playing the San Diego House of Blues tonight and I have rounded up my 2 highschool best friends/musician/singers and 3 very attractive girl friends also from the big hair 80s era - - and we plan on having our lighters ready!!

As A said (or sang), "Caan't stop believin' ... hold onto that feeelin'!!"

Those who know me or read my blog know that elsamart loves her 80s music and I plan on some serious nostalgia and fun tonight with people that lived through and still love their 80s music almost as much as I do!!

The Killing Fields

Here is Jordy-the-Cat:

 

Here is baby possum from previous blog (click here) who used to nightly visit Jordy and Fred-the-Basset at P's condo - where they'd have an animal tea party and share each other's cat and dog food and water - a very 'sharing' sentiment that I like to see in those around me he he he

 

Jordy must have remembered what fun it is to pounce on things and bring them inside to share with his momma because the last 2 nights in a row he has trotted in triumphantly with a r-a-t in his mouth (!)

 

I save the squeamish by not posting pics of the rodents - you can thank me later...

It's a Small World, after all

I had a very entertaining Saturday eve in North Park at Ray Street at Night - the art gallery street festival that happens in North Park, San Diego every second Saturday a month.

I'd had only been once to this - and alone at that - even though Patrick lived only 4 blocks away from this quaint night out of art galleries and major people-watching. Now, I made the journey here as I currently don't live in North Park and I would have even gone alone but my friends Richele and Shannon joined me and I even met best friend Diana and her husband, John, who were there partying with a bunch of 20-somethings from her office hehehe.

As we browsed one particular gallery we 3 were enthusiastically accosted by the manager/owner who kept asking us how were we, to which we'd reply, "Good, thank you." But he wanted us to respond with "Fine" because we are "Fine Women" - get it? (Good Lord, give me strength because E is not in the mood to be hit on these days). He was adamant about asking it over and over, too - but when he offered a free glass of wine to Richele and Shannon they had no problem sitting down amiably at his bar hehehe. It was then at that moment I heard behind me a voice ask, "Excuse me, what's your name?"

Now, I am the type of person who often gets recognized in some way, be it in earlier days from doing theater or appearing in commercials that were currently airing, or even modeling or ads - for Pete's sake I am still on the box of Kix 3 years running! So, I am used to people asking me what do they know me from. But they never ask my name like this gal did. Just as curious I replied to her, "Elsa" and she immediately exclaimed, "I knew it! I READ your blog!!!"

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My inner first thought was - "Do people actually read this blog???" but my verbal response was my hands flying up to either side of my head as I shook my head and smiled, "Oh my goodness - I don't even know what to say - I am so flattered - holy cow! I am really...completely flattered - gee whiz!"
Turns out this sweet gal, H - I will protect her identity - found elsamart's Gift To Gab somehow and she said, "I loved the Palin bikini picture you put up ...." as well as probably one of the most gratifying things a writer of any level could hear: "I love how you write and I feel like I know you."

Well, those who DO know me or make up the small, but international number of my regular readers should know that I do write with my heart on my sleeve. Although I can entertain while writing, I must admit that this blog has been mostly a journal of words, thoughts and pictures of my life and is done for MY happiness or reflection - not to entertain the masses necessarily. I know there are those out there in cyberland who don't know me and may accuse me of being self-absorbed when the truth is I have been keeping thousands of pages of journals since 14 and this is just my adult version of doing it.

We chatted cheerfully for a bit while I also met her friend and companion - A. As we left I invited them to head to Bluefoot Lounge down a few blocks in South Park for my Deejay friend, Morgan, was spinning that night and I wanted to support my fellow artist. To my delight the girls actually made it there a couple hours later where we danced and laughed at some of the antics going on. You know when people are genuienly down to earth - I am like that so I love it when I meet others that are like that.

Small world, eh? I had such a great time and still shake my head thinking this gal from North County came to North Park Ray at Night for the first time and runs into me when I don't even live there anymore and recognizes me from my pictures and has the grand character to approach me - I mean, that is something I would do being a "people person" and all...

And would you believe that today A recognized Patrick as well as she used to work with him at his La Jolla company??? What the??!

SMALL WORLD, eh?

I love it when interesting, out-of-the-ordinary things happen to me - that is partly what makes my life unconventional and colorful :)

And it gives me great stories to recount and blog about, of course!

Grateful

Whew hew! And just like "that" (add gay snap of the fingers here) E is back to her silly, dedicated self - after being bummed all day about losing all that video footage - I ate dinner after work, took an hour walk and settled down to try once again - and after almost 2 hours...I found (!!!) the video camera files (angelic soprano voice "ahhh" - that I emit on occasion insert here) he hehe.Jesus loves me and helped me find those things which I plan on editing and u-tubing if possible - and yes, I even am going to do one of my engagement announcement video made at Easter because if you all saw how happy and supportive my family was and the nice words my mom said about Ciara being another granddaughter you'd see what great blood I come from and know that, for my part, my love for Patrick was always real and not shared with exes or distractions or fear. I did cry, watching it just now because I had never seen it before and it made me miss my 'Cono' tremendously momentarily, but you know what? They were tears of joy - - even though he didn't follow through - because regardless of him focusing on the negative, I have always focused on his positives and when he embraced me as I cried into his shoulder, I know there were real moments of happiness with him that I, at least, felt.

I really thought after years of not wanting marriage, nor thinking I deserved it, and saying no to 2 proposals by men who barely knew me, I can say that I truly thought P was my man and I was 'his girl' as he used to say when he was tipsy and out drinking with the boys.Well, it's almost 1:30am y'all, I need to get some beauty sleep for my Nordstrom's job tomorrow.

Good night and God Bless!

Miserable

  I am miserable. Oh, I still am functional. I will never fall apart or feel sorry for myself when there are people starving, dying, sick and at war every day. But I have to admit my heart just took another recent beating 20 minutes ago when, after staying up to almost 3am last night - I've been an insomniac past couple weeks so no matter - I spent hours trying to install the software and download about 60 hours of memories for the past 3 years off my parents' digital camera.

I am miserable because there was beautiful footage on that thing. Mostly of family, the kids when some were still todlers, with my loving brother Gabe playing with them all at once, some modeling shows of me walking the runway, singing with my aunts, sisters and cousins as I played the piano, the opera performance I did last spring when selected out of thousands of alumni to perform at my highschool music mentor's retirement party. Oh, yeah - and then there was footage of Patrick, Ciara, his daughter and Fred-the-basset hound -whom I took care of, loved and thought was my family for the rest of my life.

Creative person and insomniac that I be, I already had visions of how I was going to edit clips together for my family and hell, one of P memories for me, and burn DVDs of them, etc.

But as wonderful as I am, I am NOT a technically-gifted person. The instructions were very difficult and when around 1am I managed to actually see clips on the PC I almost screamed for joy - but since I am crashing as a guest, I figure that is not a good thing to wake up everyone.

Alas, this morning I turned on the computer and none of the files were to be found. Hours of happiness gone. I quickly went to my techie German brother-in-law's house for help and when we looked at the videorecorder itself - even worse. GONE. All original files were deleted off the videocamera. Of course, the written-in-english-but-by-a-chinaman instructions assured me nothing could be deleted off the camera unless manually - no, I didn't do that last night. I knew better. But somehow, it's all gone. Completely vanished.

Believe it or not I actually feel almost as miserable about it as Patrick's deciding after me and my family's accepting him and Ciara with open arms that he doesn't want to get married and evidently wants to still sow his oats at 42 as he was on Match.com before I even moved out using the same 4 year old pictures, and deep, brooding quote that hooked me in almost 3 years ago (of course, I thought they were his own words at the time).

And why the dickens should he not be catting around already? He was popular with the girls since coming to America with his Irish accent - it's what he knows. So why try to be a good, decent person and reflect and mourn the death of our engagement and try to better himself as a man and father for the next woman in his bed and sensitive child's life?

Because, it takes a strong person to do that. And Patrick regrettably (well, no one regrets it more than me...except maybe his aging mother in Ireland who was so happy that he had a second chance with a loving, Catholic life partner) - proved himself to be pitifully weak and selfish.

So knock yourself out, date him, flirt with him, sleep with him. You've seen his pictures on here - he is handsome to most. If that is all that is important to you than knock yourself out: It's not like I am in denial that he hasn't already met up or slept with new women in the last few days, please - I am far beyond being that stupid with him anymore. Just know that if you look him up you'll have to put in 41 - since he is lying about his real age and a few other things (dancing and romantic dinners in the Gaslamp(?!!) But attractive younger women that are considered 'hotties' go to the gaslamp so I think that was a great calculated lie on his behalf to rope in the younger ladies.
Yeah, I'm pretty shocked, offended but disappointed, more than anything, because of how much I gave and he was truly blessed to have me, my family and my generosity for him and especially for his daughter whom I genuinely loved and suffered over in my concern.

There is no Justice in this world. And on this anniversary of the 9/11 Attacks I am further reminded during my loneliness without the man that led me to be in love with him as well as his child who might have been the closest thing I knew to having as my own daughter (I am 36 after all) is that - Life Is Short. Life Is Hard. We are NOT owed ANYTHING. But WE, in turn, owe our families, friends and fellow human race decency and kindness. Because it can all disappear in a flash.

Sadly, when talking to my closest sister, Sara, about it we both commented and agreed that it is those who HAVE had a tragedy in their life that 'get it'. I am thinking of Sara with her autistic only son who will be dependent on her and husband Sven the rest of their lives. I am thinking of my best friend, Diana, who lost her father to illness at the tender age of 11. Or my other dear friend, Heather, who also lost her father in a tragic, unforeseen circumstance a few short years ago. Then I think of my angelic oldest sister Ceci, who along with my oldest cousin Lisa and other peers whom have all experienced utter physical pain and heartbreak at not being able to carry their babies to term.

Am I dark? Am I, by nature, a sad person? I can be - more than most, I think. But my sadness is a direct result from watching loved ones (including my parents) go through such difficulty in life and remain faithful and good people even if their own happiness is compromised. I remain so sensitive to pain and ugliness - you've no idea - especially that of others. But on the flip side: my generosity and true ability to give and LOVE when I am the kind of person that I am (because I suffer, ya'll) gives me great thanks in my Faith because I could just as easily not be strong enough to love and genuinely care about the entire world and instead be selfish and retreat into weakness, self-servience and non-committment.

May God Bless us all - across the world - because most of us just don't get what is important and real in life. And that flippancy and self-serving, ignorant attitude is something that greatly hurts me and will continue to do so for all my days that God deems me here.

And it may sound silly to you readers about how 'miserable' it makes me but...I really, REALLY wanted that video footage of my loved ones...:(

Breaking News: US Politics getting Political

A little dated, this email was written a while back, but I am itching to start blogging again so here goes with a doozy - Editors Note

Uh oh - - Somebody didn't do their homework...

Okay, I am just loving politics right now - and I am not even a political person. But it's mighty interesting, ain't it folks?

Last week I had emailed staunch McCain supporter, Patrick, that McCain's 'choosing a woman, pro-choice conservative with a blue-collar working, half Eskimo husband' as his Vice President running mate was 'brilliant and the best decision he could have made". I was referring to the Republicans being able to scoop up the Christian pro-choice votes, all the feminists who wanted to vote for Hilary and have a woman in the White House, and garner the minority vote in her husband's lineage. I even commented to P, that "I was actually starting to believe that McCain might win the presidency after all..."

Whew! Let's not get all crazy out there on the worldwide web - let me clarify to those who don't know me that I am a registered Independent and am middle of the road - but definitely more liberal than conservative - despite a lot of my old-fsahion values and Catholic upbringing. I also didn't know until about today who I was voting for and was very open to hearing Patrick, Bill O'Reilly and Fox news TVs pro-Republican opinions and perspectives for the past 2.5 years.

That said, I laugh, YES: laugh at the turn of events that is currently going on. Firstly, my heart goes to out to Palin's 17 year old daughter for being sucked into the public eye like this (her mom should have not accepted just in order to keep her daughter's future therapy bills in mind). Yes, the ultra pro-choice, bikini-wearing while gun-toting, photogenic possible Vice Prez has a pregnant, high-school aged, unmarried daughter. I know I am going to rub my Conservative readers wrong when I say I have been teaching teens for almost a decade now - and I am going to tell you this - I highly doubt that poor girl is thrilled or not totally humiliated to be having a baby and now having to wed this boy when they are of age. A lot of parents and adults out there do NOT have a clue what is going on in schools and how bad it is. Kids are seriously having sex and fooling around more than any of you ever did and want to admit. And, yes, people, they are having abortions (even if it is terrifying and breaks their hearts and religious upbringing).

I have few opinions on politics, but one of them is on this issue - I am pro-choice. No, I was not raised that way. But I am now. And I will never accept that females cannot research and make that difficult decision without it being illegal. Be it alone, with the father, or with their parents or adult consent is a different issue that certainly warrants addressing - but to have a bunch of old white MEN in Congress dictate whether or not girls can even MAKE the choice - really gets my goat. Do I believe this young girl is 'happy' with her situation and has not secretly wished she could even fathom giving up the child but couldn't even give it a fair thought due to her mother's political career and opinions??? Well...my experience leans towards something a lot of you don't want to, or are in denial of hearing, but should be aware or prepared to hear if you are a parent.

Shoot, do my parents - ultra Catholic, God-serving, educated, old-fashioned, and of Mexican heritage like hearing that I am pro-choice now for over a decade and that I (gasp) have gay friends and I support gay marriage??? HELL, no - but I do and they love me all the same - even if they can't understand my opinions on those issues. But at least, I COULD make the choice to change my opinions from the Catholic upbringing that I blindly accepted my entire church-going life to what I believe in now. This poor gal couldn't even make that choice.

I think that McCain was hasty about making his VP decision. Everyone knows he wanted Ridge and another who are both pro-choice - so he couldn't choose them to lose the Christian vote. I believe he didn't know about the pregnancy or was naive about not thinking it would affect his whole campaign. I am sorry, the whole thing is laughable to me. Not the daughter, again, no, not her- I feel awful for her in the public eye and trying to hide her growing belly on TV by holding her new baby brother on her lap at the Rep Convention - yeah, that wasn't thought-out at all, right??? But I have been watching TV and listening to NPR and to anyone who keeps saying what is going on shouldn't be 'political' -puleaseee - it IS political that this woman has a teenage pregnant, unwed daughter. It is political that this woman is a virtual unknown with not much experience - although I applaud her energy-conservation efforts - one of the few things besides, gay rights, and pro choice and the war that I am interested in. And, of course, I think it's a great step forward having a possible woman in the White House. Although Hillary and others paved the route for Palin. (This is all probably killing Hilary right now, by the way - seeing that a virtual unknown female of a month ago may now be in the White House).

But let's also be realistic - McCain was hasty in choosing her. And I think he chose her hastily mostly because he felt he needed to 'shake things up' after the stunning Democratic convention last week. But let's remember, the man is 72 years old, that means he could be potentially 80 by the time he leaves 2 terms. This woman is truly, a heartbeat, away from taking over the White House -helllooooo! She best keep on getting that beauty sleep 'cause she's going to need it he hehe.

Ahhhh, I am not unfair. It would be unfair to point out her relative inexperience - akin to Obama - I am NO hypocrite. But, I think Obama made his own 'brilliant' choice in VP running mate Joe Biden as he is older (to balance out Obama's youth and inexperience), white (he he he - let's face it - if Obama had chosen a woman or another minority - I don't think the USA would quite be ready for all that minority and ethnicity hehehehe), and Biden has experience in foreign policy (same balancing act as the previous sentence).

Soooo...I am thinking that I am getting closer to deciding who I will be voting for - and if any of you have a problem with that - let's hear your opinions here (I know I am going to be hearing it anyway uh oh!!) or you can always stake out my mailman, pull a Tanya Harding on him by taking him out by the knee, stealing my voter mail-in ballot and ripping it passionately to shreds.

"Work it out", be involved, have an opinion and Vote!!

...

I have been disappointed and disillusioned my entire life trying to believe that Truth is in All.
When all that I do know is that LOVE is All